Saturday, July 11, 2009

yeah well I can't help it. I want to talk about blogher.

So I was talking on the phone to one of my blogher roomies this past week and just shooting the shit and talking about blogher.
This will be Piper's first conference and my second so I have all the knowledge apparently.

(It reminded me of the conversation I so distinctly recall between me and my childhood friend Missy Mount the summer before I went into first grade. I was laying on the brown nubby carpet of my living room and twirling the long beige phone cord around my little legs and telling her about what to expect at Kindergarten as she was one year younger than me. I cannot believe that I remember it- but I do. I was reassuring her of the fun she would have and telling her about the teacher and it blows my mind that I can retrieve this memory just now)

Anyhoo- I was telling Piper how excited that I am to go back to this amazing event this year.
Last year I felt like I had an enormous time.
I met so many folks that I admired and got to meet up with my soul sister.
I found my sisterhood of Kirtsy and just knew I was on the right path.
I opened my mind and ears and tried to learn and listen and absorb
so much of the amazing buzz that filled the conference.

I told Piper to just be prepared to be surrounded by wonderful.
But- even me- the extrovert to the tenth power had trouble completely fitting in.
It's like I revert to type and really kinda just entertain.
And when yr the clown- sometimes you miss out on the conversations and interactions behind the wall of people having a blast laughing with (at) you.
You know?

This year I am certain at least once (or thirty two times) I will drink a lot and dance on some sort of shaky wooden thing. I will laugh so hard that it will mimic an ab workout and I will get into some sort of mischief. This is me.
But I really want to sit quietly and talk more
to these people inside of my computer.
To engage in real life.

I want to be more brave and stop assuming that just because my blog is not a powerhouse and read by thousands that I am not someone wicked cool to talk to.
I wanted to talk to more people last year- but I was hesitant.
I suck!
I want to have interactions and experiences that go beyond what we can do for each other.
Or who we are Or who we are friends with Or what we look like.
I want to tell people all the times that their posts broke my heart and how wonderful they are and how much it means to me that writing and thoughts like I stumble upon everyday exist.
They exist in this world like a fricking buffet in the blogosphere.
Like a junkie I come and get my fill and I am delirious with it.

I wanna have the time for everything and I am certain it will fly by.
And then there are the folks I know already and my God-
I can't wait to inappropriately grope them.

I am excited to work with Neil on a ROYO session.
He is brill and I feel like I kinda know him even though I don't.
I think he will like me, but I think I will scare him.

I am nervous about reading on the keynote even though last year it was one of my favorite parts of the conference and I wanted badly to be up there under the lights. I wanted to be the girl with the most cake. I wanted to be validated and shiny and pretty. Now I just want to be able to speak properly.

But, I am still nervous.
I am also crap with faces.
I can pick out an obscure actors voice in a disney film.
I can recall voices for a lifetime-

but faces it takes me a moment.
I am nervous about that.

Are you going to blogher?
Can we hug?
Will you tell me everything is going to be alright and I won't fall down on the stage?

I want to french kiss the whole conference and tell it that it is beautiful.
That each one of us make up the whole and
that we all glisten and shine brighter through laptops across the world than stars.

I also wanna drink copious amounts of vodka and lick Tim Gunn.


Amy said...

I will add cake to my shopping list for the cooler, and I will give you the biggest piece with the fluffiest icing!

Can't WAIT!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

And just when I thought that not meeting you would be the worst thing about not going to BlogHer, I NOW find out that TIM GUNN is going to be there?!?!?

Off to slit my wrists now...

Ashley said...

I want to go so bad but that awful evil money keeps me from it.

Have fun for the rest of us and keep us updated on all the shaky structure dancing.

Rachel said...

I was just talking to my husband tonight about how I wanted to ask you to get together so I could hear your experienced thoughts about making more of blogging. So at least there's one person out there (me) who thinks you're cool and would absolutely want to spend time with you, if I were actually going to blogher.

The Redheaded Lefty said...

I'm going to find you to give you a hug! So excited. And scared of my inner social phobe.

Alexis said...

Next year, I'll join you and you can drag me out of my shell!

I think, by the way, that your blog is much better than many of the powerblogs. Sometimes, I can't tell quite why people like them, whereas your blog is smart and funny and thoroughly engaging. You should not be intimidated by anyone!!!

Piper of Love said...

Promise to keep me under your experienced and wild wing, so we can relive our shared memories, and hopefully fill in the blanks of each others spotty morning-after recolections.

I promise to be your biggest cheerleader the entire time, especially when I'm front and center photographing you during your fabulous keynote reading, which you will certainly knock out of the ballpark.

I'm so excited, I cannot wait!

OHmommy said...

Im starting to get SO nervous for the keynote. However, I am so glad I will know someone on stage. Promise, you will hold my hand?

Velma said...

You are on my list of "peeps I need to meet!"

Briar said...

I am just finding you in all this BlogHer hoopla but I am excited to think that I might meet you. I think we may be similar - I am not a Powerhouse and this is my first panel but I am on a panel and hope to make some connections with people who can WRITE WELL first and foremost. You are definitely one of those people. See you there!

MarĂ­a said...

I'm hugging you just as tightly as last year!!

Lisa Nelsen-Woods said...

I'll definitely give you a hug if it doesn't spill your vodka.

designHER Momma said...

this is my first conference - I cannot wait until next week!

I just might pee myself...

Jenn said...

You can give me a hug, but no licking please *grin*

Jenna said...

Who cares how good the conference is if you get to hang with Piper! That's enough! French kiss her from me! :) I love that girl. You're both lucky ducks and you'll both have a great time, and I think thousands of adoring fans DO read your blog, and maybe your sitemeter is broken. You're famous.

Crystal said...

ahhhh, so jealous! I would love to be there and hug you. My kids think they need to eat EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Good Lord. So spoiled.

Have a blast!

Joslyn said...

oooh i'm so bummed i won't be there this year. have a drink for me lady!

Momo Fali said...

Crap on a cracker, we are going to have SO much fun. I can't wait for you to be my wingman.

Robin Norgren, M.A, R-YT, Spiritual Director said...

Be sure to have those amzing conversations my friend. And yes, many of your posts BREAK MY HEART wide open-thank you!

sweetsalty kate said...

Oh yes to the hug. Yes! And now that I see Momo Fali says 'crap on a cracker' I'll be seeking her out too because that's just good people.

See you there! And good luck with the keynote. Think what I'll be thinking at the panel I'm on: not the typical "everyone is naked" but instead, "everyone was once a baby". Then you get to imagine them all shrivelled and projectile vomiting. Way more effective confidence boost.

Twenty Four At Heart said...

I'll be the one standing in the corner trying to overcome my shyness!

I can't find my blog said...

I simply cannot believe I missed this. Damn vacation.

You will do wonderful at the keynote. I'll be able to say, "Yeah, we broke our BlogHer cherries as roommates!"

Love ya, Girl, and I can't wait to see you!


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