Thursday, June 18, 2009

I need a new word for how I feel

I did not like finding a Smirnoff bottle in a plastic bag stuffed in my bathroom vent.
It was dirty and dusty and annoyed me.
It is like she left it there for me.
an archive of a broken relationship
Like she went into the future and knew I would find it
only she thought it would make me miss her
make me sentimental for the good times

she was wrong though
how could she know
that I found it on a day
that was sad and particularly confusing and
and my response would be to take it to the back yard
and throw it against the concrete
and watch the slivers of glass sparkle in the sun
a reminder to stay away
to learn that glass cuts
smooth skin
I need a new word for how I feel
none of the other ones capture it
like watching that glass shine and shine

8 comments:

krista said...

i'm not sure you intended for this to be beautiful, but it is. heartbreaking and raw and beautiful.

paige said...

so sorry gal--sometimes the surprises life affords are painful
xo

Kate Coveny Hood said...

I wish I could sweep up the glass for you. On so many levels...

Sizzle said...

I'd throw it too.

Poetic. Perfect.

Rachel said...

wow.

I would love to have something profound to say because this post merits that.. but, I don't.

Wow.

Beautiful, poignant, resonating, powerful. Thank you.

vincent said...

When you are the type of person that is deep and feels deeply, life can always seem a little too much. This is just so sad. Sorry...

Patois42 said...

What an insightful post. This is truly magnificent.

fruitlady said...

If you ever figure out what that word is let me know. Maybe it will have a word that rhymes with it about how I feel now too.

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