Friday, June 4, 2010

What runs through my mind at night- moments before I fall asleep

My other granny- the minister's wife is struggling with a heart that wants to push from her chest. She has a ticker that tocks and knocks and causes her pain. She is weak now and it makes me sad. She is a painter and keeps telling my mother to ask me what I would like her to paint for me. I resist for this whole past year or so. I don't want the last of anything. It sounds so final. What would you have someone paint for you if it would be the last thing they may ever paint for you?

She's sensitive. She may even have it.
The ability to find the information hidden from most of us- from the senses.
Extrasensory perception.
Whatever.
She woke up one time in the night and said a plane crash was happening and it was.
Her son was in a plane crash.
She also woke up and circled a date on the calendar.
Her father died on that day.

I want her to paint my future.
In colors bright and vivid.
I can hang it up on the wall and never be afraid to look at it.
Or share it.
When the light hits yr lens you will see peace
and all throughout your body a feeling will wash right over you.

It will feel like the way it feels when someone rubs your head

and you know that through their fingers pulse love.

12 comments:

Rachel said...

wow

{speechless at the beauty}

xxoxo

Momo Fali said...

I love this so much, I can't even put it into words. It's beautiful and makes my heart hurt.

Kyran said...

So poignant. xo

Maggie said...

Ooh. I got that feeling reading this. Beautiful, Amy.

Heather of the EO said...

This is so moving, Amy. Beautiful. Thank you.

I want her to paint your future too.

Elizabeth @claritychaos said...

I'm always so moved by the intimacy of your poetry.

I was just asking someone today what makes a poem a good poem. And she paraphrased Emily Dickinson and said if it feels like the poem has taken off the top of my head, then I know it's good.

That's how this felt.

-elizabeth

I can't find my blog said...

Amazing...

180360 said...

Find your answers NOW. That is all I can say.

Unknown said...

to the minister's wife

Anonymous said...

momo fali stole my words....

beautiful and makes my heart hurt.

you are full of emotional beautifulness.

Peas said...

I just read this. Made me teary to remember the $50 Christmas Check that my grandpa gave me 2 Christmases ago. It was the first year he'd written out the checks for all of the 16 grandkids, since my Grandma had passed away just the year before.

It was clear his health was failing too (don't they say 6 months after your love has died?) and didn't cash that check....I didn't cash it all the way until I lost it. As though if I cashed it, it'd be the last one...or make it real. *sigh*

Black Hockey Jesus said...

Nice. Thanks for sharing this.

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